Issue 29: Fish and Foulmouth

[yendorj]

"Gabby, I think the tent peg's knocked hard enough into the sand."

[kurff]

"Wolverines right, we have the horsemen to contain and civilians to get off the field of battle. Let's focus on that. my teleport trick won't keep buried apocalypse forever. He did not live thousands of years on pure luck." she winced and slowly stood.

"Suggestions on how to deal with our civies would be welcome." she asks.

[Mierin]

Gabby shoots Wolverine and Blink a 'WTF are you talking about, Willis?' look. "Dude, I was referring to the currently stunned Namor. Geez, read the posts and keep up with the game!" Gabby rolls her eyes at Wonder Man in a 'Get a load of these jokers' fashion.

[yendorj]

(Kuff, got your words mixed around. "won't keep buried apocalypse forever", I think)

"...I'll never understand you or Deadpool, and don't think Xavier could fix my head if I tried. Keep him out of water and as far from Apocalypse as possible."

Wolverine takes out his phone, snaps a picture of Deadpool for later.

[kurff]

"Deadpool of any reality will leave most people a mess. I've met a few," she confirms "The old one-two, huh. Gabby? You have been watching black and white TV programs from the old days' TV again haven't you?" she grinned. "Give me a second and I can put a portal to slam him through just like Thor did to the wrecking crew." she draws a pin leaving 5 pins in her quiver.

"Wonderman, heads up!" she tries to get behind Namor to plant the portal anchor, failing that will throw a pin to anchor the portal behind Namor and placing the end further from water.

Prowl (If needed):
Prowl: 5BzydIeM1d100/65%

Pin: (-2 applied to roll)
1d20+3 1d100·1d20+3

[doc]

(Tabitha)

She made her way to the down Orka and Tiger Shark, only to find another pink barrier blocking her. As she phased through it, Tabitha saw Stingray, his hands crackling with electricity.

0pNqZ5ad1d20+3(Strike)
3d6 (Damage plus save vs. stun)

"You have a molecular intangibility capability, like the Vision? Let's see how you deal with some electric shock!"


(Blink, Wonder Man, Gabby, Wolverine)

Hawkeye was visibly disturbed. "Wolverine. Laughing. There's something I thought I'd never hear, and now that I have, I never want to hear that sound for the rest of my life."

"You should hear his singing voice! He does a mean "Summer of '69"!" Deadpool coughed up sand.

"I hit this guy harder than anyone who wasn't in Thor's weight class, and he's still talking." Atlas shook his head.
"Stay down or-"

"-or I kill my hostage?"
"Your what?" Hawkeye turned back. "You have a hostage? Where?"

"I always have a hostage. Does no one remember my first ongoing? It made McGuiness and Casey rockstars! Hold on, I'll get you a live feed."

Deadpool pulled a smartphone out of his belt and showed a live feed.

It was Foggy Nelson, tied to a chair in his office, with a rag in his mouth, and a paper stapled to his shirt reading "Kidnapped by Deadpool!" with the Merc with a Mouth's famous logo colored on in crayon.


"See when I took the job, I figured I might have a run in with Namor, so I did my research, and it turns out that these lawyers worked with him back in the Silver Age and well, come on, look at this putz."

Atlas raised his fist. "Tell us where, cornball or -"

Deadpool teleported. He was now behind Wonder Man.


Somehow he had strapped an explosive vest onto Wonder Man.

"OK, it's not a great look, but a guy who used to regularly wear a bright red safari jacket has no business to complain about fashion."

The vest began ticking.

Namor seemed to snap out of his stupor and acted without hesitation. He hit Wonder Man with a flying tackle and hit the water with the Ionic Avenger as the vest detonated. Both men emerged from the waves unharmed.

Hawkeye looked to Blink. "So...where did you port Apocalypse to?"1d20+3·6d6

[kurff]

"he's buried in the sand in that direction. I wasn't about to have him get away. my guess he is probably digging out or finding some other way out. Didn't want him to pop up under us in mid-fight. all that celestial tech he should not suffocate. It was sand or rock. Sand seemed like the better option to dig him out of." she answers looking at the image dead pool showed and pointing toward where she put Apoc, "Good crayon work. Not many can pull that off and still look effective." Blink was wondering how to deal with Deadpool, but he was not a big threat. there were more pressing concerns like calling up old friends with favours.

"So Deadpool, clearly you have a plan. not surprising really. the only surprise is you didn't involve 99 red balloons or a pack of man-eating dropbears. So Deadpool what exactly do you have in mind and I don't have crayons to write them out with, my apologies." she adds with a grin. Better to play nice see what he was up too.

[yendorj]

"Bub, you should hear the animalistic noises I make in certain conditions," smirks. "Wonder Man, grab him. Atlas, give Namor hand away from the beach. Deadpool, I don't know how you know that."

[Mierin]

When Gabby first hears that Deadpool has a hostage, she laughs. "Of course you do. Classic 'Pool!" However, when she realizes that the hostage is Foggy, she frowns and is clearly upset. "YOU KIDNAPPED MY BOO!?!?" Gabby yells angrily at DP, "UNCOOL, BRO! UUUNNNCOOOOOOL!!" Crossing her arms under her chest, Gabby asks, "Where is he?"

[dakota]

Frustrated and starving as she passed through the last of Songbird 's energy walls, Tabby was surprised to find Stingray waiting for her. She was about to speak when he unleashed his own electrical blast at her, causing her to shriek as she tried to avoid it

Dodge 1lNg8iEi1d20+4

Save vs stun 1d201d20+4·1d20

[doc]

Hawkeye knocked another arrow. "And this is the part where-"

"-his law office! Hell's kitchen"

The Avenging Archer shot Gabby a glance. "Go. Get him."

"Good Luck! Seriously, I'm indestructible! I have cancer powers! I'm a damn Horseman of the Apocalypse what are you going to -"

Namor picked up Deadpool and tore him half at the waist.

"-REALLY SHOULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING!" The Merc with the mouth crawled towards his severed lower half.

"You back to yourself, your high-and-mightiness?" Hawkeye quipped.

"Do not presume to mock the Ruler of Atlantis, Surface-Dweller. My mind is clear."

"OK, that sounds about right."

Stingrays attack staggered Tabitha, enough to clear her mind of Apocalypse' influence, but not the power. Not the hunger.

Hawkeye relaxed. "OK, now for-"

The earth shook.

A 50 foot Apocalypse broke through the ground, howling.

"Blink? Did you say anything about Apocalypse being able to absorb the mass of sand to become a giant?" Songbird sighed.

[yendorj]

"Namor, small favor. Throw the lower half as far as you can." Sighs seeing Apocalypse rise out of the sand to a 50' giant. "Sentinels fall just as easily."

[Paladin]

Simon misses that Deadpool teleported behind him, and is aghast to see the vest strapped to his chest, almost by sleight of heand.

"You think that's..."

As Wondy gets tackled into the waves by Namor, he is startled, thinking momentarily that he'd failed, and Namor, now strengthened by the ocean, would kill him - if the vest didn't.  

However, as the vest detonates underwater and he emerges unharmed, he realizes that, somehow, Namor must've broken Apocalypse's mind control.  He turns to the scion of Atlantis.  "Thanks."

Then he watches in shock as Namor rips Deadpool in two.  Is... That can't be legal.  

Simon turns to Hawkeye.  "So, we've got Foggy in a warehouse, Half of Deadpool over here, and half over there, and Apocalypse buried in the sand.  What's the move?"

Then, Just as suddenly, Apocalypse breaks free.

"Okay, I guess I can see the next move for myself."1d20+7·1d20+4·1d20+2·1d20+4·4d6+26UCNJVK7T

[dakota]

Tabitha dropped to all fours as she reverted to her normal form. “What in Doom’sake came over me? Haven’t been this hungry since...,” she trailed off mid sentence to look up at Stingray protecting the others, “Thanks. Whatever you hit me with knocked whatever Apocalypse hit me with out, if that makes any sense.” She smiled awkwardly, openly admitting it was not clear to her either.

Weak as she was, as they heard Apocalypse roar behind her, Tabby got to her feet and looked at the other Avenger, “ You can fly, right? Ever deliver a Fastball Special? I need you to fly at Apocalypse as fast as you can in a bombing run. I won’t transform until you release and hopefully he won’t see us coming.” She clutched her stomach as it rolled, “I don’t suppose any of you have a Snickers hidden in your pocket?”

[kurff]

"on my earth, he could change size without sand. I thought you knew yours probably could too. One of many powers he does not use or that are merged with his regular powers. Hard to tell with so many mutant powers and his alien tech from that starship he probably had." she looked up.

"I say Target limbs to disable and limit his movement." she suggested. looking up "Once he's down you can try and cuff him if you want to..Hawk. But I am certain Namor has better more permanent ideas and you need a very tough prison or other stasis to hold him." she gave Hawkeye a look then looks to field of battle for ideas.

"Sorry, no snickers here." she winces again, "Okay I am totally not going to be a help..but better to go out fighting. I suppose the Oldman would like it that way.." she thinks charges the pins. only 6 pins left to go. the idea teleporting herself and apoc into a solid mass to kill them both was now an option. Hawkeye and the rest wanting to not kill was noble. But Apoc was right this was about survival.

Strike: Ef56p|3O1d20+5
Damage: 1d61d20+5·1d6